honesty

It seems like a lot of my thoughts stem from something I've read.  Reading is one of the great joys in life.  On this particular occasion I was reading a magazine with an article on eliminating stress, or at least I think that was what it was about.  The only thing I remember is it talked about being honest.  The author expressed that we should be honest about what our lives are really like.  Not in just the words we say, but in our actions.  Actions?  Huh...I had never really thought about actions being honest or dishonest.

Sometimes we put on appearances that things are different than they really are.  Maybe we pretend to have more money than we actually do by buying on credit.  Or when we have a party and our house is perfectly clean, not a fingerprint on the fridge, or dish in the sink or dust bunny behind the TV.  Is that a true representation of who we are?  I am particularly sensitive to this subject of housekeeping because I am such a terrible housekeeper.  I love having a clean organized house, but there seems to be so many other things I would rather be doing.  Inviting people over is at times the only way I actually get it clean.  The pressure of someone seeing my house a disaster is what motivates me to get it clean.  The author of the article suggested that when someone says, "I love your house" or "Your house looks great" that we reply by saying something something like, "Thanks it took me three days to clean it."  Ha ha, that's the truth.  Sometimes it does take me three days to clean my mess.

I love seeing how other people live.  And I love looking at homes.  Before we had children, Q and I used to go to real estate open houses just for fun.  So a few years ago when I went to a friend's home for the first time, she offered to show me her house, and I was delighted.  It is a modest home they had built several years prior.  As we came into the master suite, we went into the bathroom and she said, "please excuse the mess, but we live here."  Ahhh....those were the sweetest words I had ever heard, "we live here".  Of course her house isn't perfect, with a few clothes on the floor and things on the bathroom counter.  It was an eye opening moment for me.  Those words gave me permission to not be embarrassed that we LIVE in our home.  That kids make messes. That some days I leave my shoes and clothes lying on the ground at the foot of my bed because I was just too tired to put them away properly.  That the dishes don't always get done before I go to bed. And there is a constant mound of clean laundry that needs to be folded in the chair in my bedroom. Those words helped me realize that I don't have to be perfectly tidy to allow others into my home. What a relief.

So with that in mind, excuse me while I go do the dishes and pick up the living room because a friend will be here any minute.